Where Do The Ugly Diamonds Go? Alternate Employment Options For The Homely Diamond

When most people think of diamonds, they immediately think of romance – followed by a quick check of the ol’ bank account balance. But did you know that a majority of the diamonds that are mined from the earth can’t be used as gemstones?

Yet, all is not lost for these undesirable diamonds. Diamonds are ridiculously hard, resistant to heat and virtually indestructible, so many of these diamonds wind up in industrial grade machines and tools. Yes, while you are popping the question with a diamond engagement ring, there’s a guy using a diamond to engrave some poor shmo’s tombstone. Here are some interesting industrial uses for diamonds.

1. Engraving Tombstones

Diamonds are able to cut through some of the toughest and more impervious stones. Marble? – No problem. Granite? – Like a hot knife through butter. This is exactly why diamonds make such great tools for etching and engraving tombstones. Did you know that there is a cemetery in Russia where life-sized portraits of the local mafia are etched on their tombstones?

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2. Super High Quality Speakers

For the non-audiophile, a dome tweeter sounds like something you do in bed on prom night. To an audiophile, the superiority of a dome tweeter is basically what makes or breaks a speaker’s sound quality. That’s where diamonds come into play. Some dome tweeters are made with diamonds – for the diamond’s ability to control vibration to a perfect pitch. They say that a diamond dome tweeter is the key ingredient to making the best speakers in the world. If you have a half million dollars to blow, you could go for a pair of Exquisite Extreme Grand Limited speakers from Dutch speaker manufacturer, Kharma.

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3. X-Ray Machines

Every dude has wished for x-ray vision at some point in his life – I’m sure there are a few ladies out there who have wished for it too. However, if you were to suddenly be gifted with x-ray vision, your brain would probably explode from the radiation and your eyes would melt all over your face. This is why real x-ray machines use diamonds – to absorb and reflect heat. Diamonds are also invisible through an x-ray machine, so you get a clearer picture by using diamonds in the lens of the x-ray glass.

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4. Prosthetic Human Joints

Another weird use for diamonds has to do with prosthetics. Most prosthetic knee joints use metal parts. Over time, however, these knee joints start to wear away and the metal fragments and debris enter the rest of the body. In a recent study published in the scientific journal Acta Biomaterialia, tiny diamonds implanted in knee joints offer the most friction free, durable and painless of prosthetic knee joint options.

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5. Madonna’s eyelashes

Doctors warn that false eyelashes can cause all sorts of problems – from infections, to losing your real eyelashes and even blindness. Those doctors probably don’t understand anything about beauty. Plus, these warnings didn’t stop Madonna – aka Madge; aka Mo; aka The Queen of Pop; aka Nonnie; aka Esther; aka The Material Girl – from blowing over 20 grand for a pair of diamond eyelash extensions. In the end, though, that doesn’t beat the strangest false eyelashes in the world – an artist by the name of Jessica Harrison takes dead fly legs and calls them Flylashes. Um…I’ll take the diamond lashes any day.

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